Monday 10 December 2012

Enough with your hateful frapes!


We all know the story; we have probably all been there at one time or another. You pop onto facebook while you are at your mates place to check the details of an event or do some casual stalking. Next thing you know you have triple the amount of notifications and a status up date along the lines of this:

“I am a gay man and I love it in my bum! Please put your homosexual penis in my homosexual anus.”

Or, for the ladies out there:

“Hey everyone, just letting you all know that I am coming out of the closet! That's right guys, I’m a bonified rug muncher; someone better be getting me a pair of Doc Martins for Christmas!”

Or even something like this:




Oh, stop! My stomach! I’m laughing more than the stoned gamer from Laddergoat! Being gay or transgender is the funniest joke of all time!

Oh, no, wait a minute...it’s a lived reality for thousands around the world who all experience varying degrees of discrimination, hatred, inequality and violence. Silly me.

Congratulations frapist; you have just contributed to the phenomena known as online bullying. Three guesses as to who the victim is? (Handy hint: not your hetero, cis-sexual friend).

Your frape isn’t funny and it isn’t innocent. You are contributing to a social environment that frames lesbian, gay and transgender people as freaky ‘others’. Something that must be laughed at in order to conceal our all engulfing fear of what we do not understand. Besides, the joke is old. Originality is key to good comedy, and LGBT bashing has been done. Either get some new material (preferably not rooted in fear and ignorance) or do us all a huge favour and just log the fuck out of your friend’s facebook.

Sunday 25 November 2012

High fives for everyone in Sweden (and maybe a couple for Top Toy, too).

Sweden has just added one more reason to the ever growing list to move out of this narrow minded dump we call New Zealand and high tail it to the happiest country in the world that sounds like a vegetable. The general emphasis in Sweden towards gender equality has forced one of social progression's biggest foe to get their shit together...advertising.

Just yesterday Top Toy, a Swedish toy company, released their Christmas catalogue with complete gender reversal on all the pictured products. Everything from the pink aisle was being played with by boys while girls sported Nerf guns and really expensive pretend ride on lawn mowers. While I personally think that simply reversing gender is by no means the end of the battle for equality, this catalogue is a huge step forward in an industry that clings desperately to outdated gendered stereotypes in order to rake in the cash.


This image made me poop my feminist dungarees in excitement!

It's pretty important to remind ourselves at this point that Top Toy doesn't give two figs about gender equality (even if it is Swedish). The fact that their Denmark catalogue doesn't venture one iota from the status quo is testimony to this. Top Toy doesn't care if boys or girls play with barbies or tractors, as long as their parents are willing to shell out their hard earned credit to buy their kids plastic crap several times a year. But before you run crying to your bed, hugging yourself close to your pillow as you mourn your lost friendship with Top Toy's marketing department, consider this: the fact that Top Toy doesn't particularly care about amending gender norms while doing it any way is a huge testimony to the power of social dissatisfaction. Sweden cried, and complained, and wailed and bitched and moaned about how crappy gender stereotypes are, and after crying and complaining and wailing and bitching for long enough, loud enough, finally, some marketing research team realised that the old formula just wasn't going to cut the mustard in Sweden this year. And the great Top Toy gender-fuck catalogue was born.

This gives me much hope for the future children of New Zealand (except for my kids. My kids are going to play with carboard boxes and sticks, like the good old days).

Wednesday 21 November 2012

Fun Adventures of Rachael the Cleaner!


Having recently finished up at uni for the year, I eagerly prepared myself for the exciting summer ahead. Beers and barbeques; sunbathing and beaches; picnics in the gardens! I settled down to enjoy all of the spoils of summer...for about a week. Next thing I know I’m eating a stale egg sandwich in Temuka Tea Rooms before re-boarding my bus bound for Christchurch and six day work weeks. For the past few summers I have found myself working for a rental company cleaning properties between tenants. Being hot boxed by cleaning chemicals in small bathrooms, ruining all my clothes with Janola and acquiring second degree oven cleaner burns are many of the fun activities that I have enjoyed during my employment. In only my second or third day back at work, I found myself stationed in a flat that acted as the ‘office’ of a group of, um, working women. While pulling multi-coloured wads of hair out of the shower drain and scrubbing candle smoke from the walls (the ‘romantic first date’ package had been proving popular this year) a man walks in off the street and yells up the stairs,
“Excuse me? Are you available, or are you about to head out?”
My boss, an attractive blonde female dressed head to toe in bleach stained cleaning clothes somewhat similar to this [see below] misinterprets this entirely and answers,
“No sorry; this flat has already been rented out.”

The 'sexy maid' option, for men who get off on realism.

Confused and dejected, the man slowly backs out of the room and out the door.

Following him is venom from my judging eyes.

Anger and hatred simmer beneath the surface for the rest of the afternoon. Satisfying imaginary scenarios where I come running down the staircase brandishing my scrubbing brush and screaming “women are not for sale, you misogynistic son of a bitch!” replay themselves in my mind, increasing in scale and intensity with every rerun. My instant, unprovoked anger revealed to me that afternoon a severe prejudice I never really knew I had; I hate the sex industry. More specifically, I hate the people who use it. I know that it is generally seen as more progressive for feminists these days to be totally down with the prozzies, but I just can’t. Please don’t get me wrong; I am firmly pro legal prostitution, and am proud to live in a country where sex workers receive valid legal protection, recognition and an opportunity to work from a safe environment (even if I do have to clean it up after them). But that doesn't mean that I have to sympathise with their choices, or the choices of the men who visit them. The fact that it is not seen as completely unthinkable to buy a woman like she is a piece of meat makes me very sad, and very, very angry.

Maybe one day I will be mature enough to sit down and rethink my disdain of sex work. I will look at the issue from multiple perspectives and hear this man, and others like him, out in an open minded and understanding way. But today, my friend, is not that day. Get out there and earn your sex through personality, mutual respect and a dash of charm like everybody else has to you lazy, sad little man!

Sunday 4 November 2012

Tits Out for the Boys P3: Bonnie Black and Back to the Strip Club



The Legendary Bonnie Black and Back to the Strip Club

So, what is the key difference between performing aerial acrobatics and stripping? Only one simple word, according to Bonnie Black. Swap dance for fitness and you have yourself one legitimate physical art form. And I don’t think she is too wrong; the acrobatics, contortion and gravity defiance from the Grease performance wouldn’t be out of place in circus arts, if it weren’t for the stripper connotations. But, unlike her students, Bonnie does not feel the need to separate herself from strip culture because she once played a large role in the stripping culture of Dunedin, and is set to again.
            Bonnie has been working as a stripper and pole fitness performer for over five years, beginning her stripping career in Dunedin before jumping the ditch to work in an upmarket Melbourne club. When she returned to Dunedin she decided that it was time to share her knowledge and skills with others, and opened up “Vertical Aerial Dance” studio during a time where pole fitness was even more seeped in controversy than it is now. She explained to me that before she opened her fitness studio, most pole dance classes acted as strip club recruitment agencies, and focused more on bum wiggles than shoulder mounts and inverted hip holds. Now she runs over 10 classes a week with help from her second teacher, Amanda, as well as organise annual large scale shows and private tutoring. She is known around Dunedin as one of the best and most brutal teachers around, and she is in constant demand from dancers of all backgrounds for strength and flexibility training, making her particularly tricky to get an interview with. After an hour of sipping coffee and reading beat up, out of date photography magazines, Bonnie finally rolls in to a central cafe where we organised to meet with her long brown hair draped over her comfy jumper, complimented with track pants and running shoes. Quite a contrast to her usual spangly lycra stage attire, although her stretchy pants suggest that she is ready to perform feats of flexibility at any time. But far from the glamorous rehearsals or dance practice her clothing suggests, she has in fact been gardening with her parents. We begin by talking about them, and she tells me that her mother pushed her and her sisters into ballet at a young age: “My mum was very conservative, she always wanted me to be a ‘ballet dancer.’” She draws out the words ‘ballet dancer’ as if they were tinged with lemon juice. But despite her mothers’ vision  of “Swan Lake” and The Royal New Zealand Ballet, Bonnie had other plans for her dance knowledge.
She goes on to tell me of a one of her most consistently well received routines in her repertoire. Bonnie would leave the conventional Stiletto shoes in the dressing room and perform an entire strip routine on point. The performance was a crowd favourite would often inspire women to “punch their boyfriends in the ribs and yell ‘tip her’!”  I don’t ask why the women couldn’t simply tip Bonnie themselves, although I suspect that the g-string acting as a wallet may have something to do with it. Bonnie and a group of fellow professionally trained dancers self-proclaimedly “brought the club out of the gutter”. She explains that to her, stripping just felt like a performance of any other; no shame or guilt necessary. Dancing is dancing, as far as Bonnie is concerned, and if one does it with skill, expresses themselves, indulges in their love of dance and manages to go home every night with hundreds of dollars in their well manicured hand, then why should it matter if they were wearing a tutu or nipple tassels? The distance that Bonnie now keeps between herself and stripping is for the sole benefit of her pole fitness students, not herself. In fact, coming back to Dunedin and setting up the pole fitness studio has not caused a clear break from stripping for Bonnie at all. She continues to perform at strip shows and performs with “Exotic Burlesque” troupe, but under the strict direction that the name of her studio is never used to promote the event. Mere weeks before our interview, Bonnie had been recruited to be the dance manager of a new club opening in Dunedin, and she took it with avid excitement as well as professionalism.
While stripping, when examined through a feminist lens, is quite obviously a dance form infused with gender power imbalances and objectification, feminists have forgotten one very important thing; the power of the stage. John Berger[1], an art critic and important figure in feminist theories of the male gaze, says that “the be nude is to be in disguise,” meaning that the social construction of the female nude body turns that body into a thing and not a person. This could be seen as a very negative process for women, but in the world of stripping, disguise is essential. The stage creates this disguise. What the audience sees is not the woman revealed, but her disguise; the woman retains ownership over her real body, its authentic movements, reactions, spontaneity and sexuality, rather than the cartoon sexuality displayed on the stripper’s stage. The stage is a place of power and control; you are physically and psychologically elevated over the audience. Whether you are there out of economic necessity, like Lexie, or for artistic expression like Bonnie, when you are on the stage every movement and action is infused with the power of the stage. A mere step or flick of the wrist becomes an action of performance, a beautiful and powerful gesture of expression and talent. It is when strippers come off the stage that the real power imbalances begin, which is where the real difference comes in strip culture for fun and stripping for a living: the dancer is forced to exit the powerful stage and wonder the seedy realm of the audience, where her psychological and physical dominance is, excuse the pun, stripped from her.
            Well, maybe not entirely. As Bonnie Black so eloquently words it “I don’t know why anyone would fuck with a stripper! Those massive seven inch heels make good goddamn weapons. Don’t fuck with a stripper!” Good advice, I’ll make sure to head it in future. But even Bonnie, whose tough words and even tougher teaching regimes leave many students and performers shaking with fear, has received her fair share of inappropriate behaviour in her time as a stripper. Gropings, grabbings and humiliation are still common place in a stripper’s working life.
 Back in the strip club changing room I end up talking to Serenity, one of the most talented dancers of the night, about her experiences with audiences and power. Staring into a glaringly lit mirror, she applies her heavy make-up while enthusiastically delving into the various ways in which occupying the stage and excelling as a dancer has not merely boosted her confidence; it gave her confidence when she had had none at all. Outside of her stripping role, Serenity is a self-confessed tomboy and being in this line of work has put her in touch with a feminine beauty that she felt she was missing from her life. However, looking the part of girly-girl may elevate her esteem, but playing the part is a different matter. Despite her skills as a dancer and her strength in the pole moves, she finds it hard to entice tips once she enters into the audience because she just can’t put on the passive girl act. “I can’t just be like “fuck you,” she says. And to myself, I wonder, what it is exactly that the audience members are doing to warrant a firm and final ‘fuck off’? And what are the effects on Serenity, this normally strong and vocal women, when the stripping role forces her to be silent? She tells me that stripping has made her a “nicer person,” but is being forced to lower personal boundaries and limits really what constitutes pleasantness? Or is it subservience? The strength and dominance afforded to the dancer by the stage and by the strength exhibited on the pole must be undone once she exits the stage by playing into every sickening stereotype of femininity; passivity, sexual availability and ‘lady-like’ manners. On the stage, the stripper maintains power through the stage disguise; but when the dancer descends the stage she descends into a social climate of objectification and male power, into a realm where humiliation and violation are standard and even expected. Their heels may be 7 inch weapons, but the politics of the stripper’s vocation rarely allows her the chance to wield them.

Conclusion
 As I delved deeper into the world of strippers, I attempted to challenge my own prejudices as well as those of society at large. As a woman and a feminist, I attempted to put myself in the strippers towering shoes and understand how things look from the top of the waxed pole. And, in the end, the view wasn’t so bad. Women were finding their self confidence in Burlesque, challenging their bodies and minds through pole fitness and carving new and interesting paths for themselves as strippers. So when, towards the end of my research, I was asked to join the team at Bonnie’s new club, I didn’t think that it would be such a big deal. I thought that I could check it out and assess this new situation with the clarity of a person that was well informed and un-tinged by foundation-less prejudice. I walk into the new club on the day of its opening night. The familiar smell of saw dust dominates the room as masses of people frantically clean and organise in preparation for the big night. I look around, and in the empty seats people materialise, drinks in hands. The boom of male laughter echoes around the wooden walls. Sticky, glass covered floors and vibrating pop music fills the silent air; I am transported back to every moment in my life that has been dominated with masculine ickyness; every cat call aimed at me while I mind my own business in the streets; every seedy man in every bar that feels I owe them a conversation; every creep on the bus who walks past row after empty row to sit next to me. And it is at this moment that I know I can’t be a stripper. And I know that I have always known this. After months or writing, investigating and forging relationships with women in Dunedin’s strip culture, was my own reluctance to participate a hypocritical one? Was everything that I had been writing, been thinking, a lie?
            The problem is not stripping. The problem is that stripping does not end when you leave the club. The traits of femininity, as forged in a patriarchal culture, that strippers are expected to fill- subservience, sexual availability and hegemonic feminine appearance- are not isolated to the working woman. These are the traits that every woman is expected to fulfil; the stripper simply embodies the expectations on us all. So yes, stripping (like advertising, pornography, film and fine art) contributes to maintaining this patriarchal culture in which we live. While the stripper is expected to fulfil the oppressive restrictions of femininity that place women in subordination to men, the frame of the strip club will always be that of disrespect. What burlesque and pole fitness illustrate is that erotic expression and an erotics of disrespect do not need to go hand in hand; dancer’s from both disciplines demand respect while expressing their sexuality and creativity on a stage that retains the power of the performer. An erotic aesthetic based on dignity is, in my opinion, not at all out of the question. I think, for the sake of erotic performers and for the larger relations of women to men both broadly and intimately, we need to embrace and popularise a sexual gaze that is not a disrespecting gaze- what is needed is an erotics of respect.


[1] Berger et al., 1972 

Thursday 25 October 2012

Toilet Conundrum

So...I just used a man's public toilet by mistake...and I feel nothing.

I didn't even realise until I was washing my hands next to a most unusual looking silver contraption. I now understand that this is what a urinal looks like. Interesting...they are not how I imagined.

Urinals in Dunedin public toilets don't look like this.

I then turned on my remarkably lady like high heel boots to dry my hands next to a stunned and silenced man.

"Whoops" I say, and stroll on out.

I know that at this point I should be running home in shame, hiding myself from all public view for a period of a week or two, crying softly while rocking back and forth, lamenting my earth shattering mistake.

But, here's the thing. I used the wrong toilet by accident. The sun still rises in the east and sets in the west. Birds still cheep and cows still moo. Nothing bad has happened, and I feel fine (although somewhat bad for my new toilet friend. I don't think he is taking this quite as well as I am, probably because he is still trying to work out how where I hide all my man bits).

I've been studying gender for far too long.

Sunday 21 October 2012

Tits Out for the Boys P2: Stripping...for Fun?



Stripping...for Fun?

A Hootchy Kootchy Burlesque Revival
Sexual pouting lips? Check. Sequin encrusted costumes? Check? Removing these costumes? Check. No, this isn’t a stripper’s dressing room, but could be any burlesque performance around the world at this point in time. Or, as I experience, any Burlesque dance class. As costuming is such an important aspect of the art form, beginner classes spend almost as much time talking about where to buy corsets as how to step, together, step. Burlesque is credited as the mother of modern stripping, but after its many revivals, what we are seeing today is an interesting domestification of burlesque dance. What was once so shocking about burlesque has become relatively mundane (oh no, don’t remove that glove! What would your mother say?) As a do-it-yourself burlesque revival storms the western world, burlesque classes and shows are popping up everywhere. Women from all walks of life have joined classes and performed on stage in the burlesque tradition, not only volunteering their bodies for the gaze, but sacrificing time, money and energy to do it. All around the world woman have reclaimed burlesque for themselves, and Dunedin is one of the leading small cities in this trend.
But are these women simply passive dupes of a patriarchal system? Or are they the powerful, hot young things of Brown’s Cosmopolitan world? As I get to know more of the women involved in Burlesque, I realise that they are neither. Take 48 year old Debbe; I met Debbe over the scramble for sequins in a class run by nation-wide burlesque brand Hootchy Kootchy, one of the most commercially successful burlesque groups in Dunedin. Debbe has been attending burlesque classes for only six weeks at the time of my visit, but she’s been involved in feminism for a lot longer than that. Growing up, she had four sisters and a mother who was active at the height of second wave feminism; avid sing alongs to “I am Woman, Hear me Roar” were common place for Debbe growing up. The effect of this feminist upbringing remain strong: “I actively try not to limit choices for myself or bow to societal norms.  I have been referred to as a ‘boundary pusher’ which was intended as a negative trait but I have accepted it as a compliment.” She writes in an email after we meet. She confesses that she is selective about who she tells about her new found hobby, however, for fear of having to explain and justify her choices. And it is not only Burlesque dancers that fear the judgement of others because of their stripper related activities.

“It’s Just Aerial Acrobatics!” Pole dance and pole fitness.
There is an ever pervasive misconception that stripper’s poles are greasy, but ask yourself this; how could anyone hang upside down from a steel pole 6cm in diameter using only the crease of their leg if said pole was covered in grease? The reality is the exact opposite of this misconception; pole dancers’ poles are waxed. The first time I ever saw pole dance was, in fact, thanks to the very process of waxing poles, or more specifically the time that it takes to wax a pole. During pole dance shows, there is an awkward gap of three of four minutes while the poles undergo maintenance for the next set of performances, and a successful Dunedin pole dance studio recruited some circus performers and I to fill in the gaps (by night I swap my writers pen for belly dance bra and belt, in case you were wondering). I parade around the stage, always looking out my peripherals to make sure I was not  about to smack into a pole or a person, while women in black shorts and bare feet crawl up poles, fire-man style, coating them with large white candles. I shimmy and shake and spangle my little heart out, but as I look out to the audience I meet no one’s gaze. I sit back in the audience to watch the rest of the show, when one kindly audience member turns to me and says: “Don’t worry about it love; you tried your best.” Outshined by a pole monkey.
But it is no wonder that I was not impressing anyone in that particular audience. These women show strength and gravity defiance that most of us common folk could only dream of, and that’s just the pole management team. Recently I was asked to yet again distract an audience-who-needs-no-distraction as the studio puts on a huge four night production of everyone’s favourite, secretly dirty, musical Grease. I pop along to their dress rehearsal to scope out the stage and to chat with the performers.


The thing that strikes me is the sound. Across the studio screeches the sound of flesh simultaneously gripping and sliding across metal. It sounds like a pain verging on torture, but when I ask some of the dancers about it they unanimously answer that it sounds much more painful than it really is. There are plenty of other moves that do cause pain, but I am told that they are the silent ones. As Irene, a blonde with a slightly vacant look in her eyes, tells me with a laugh: “If you don’t like pain, don’t do pole dancing”. Am I in a room full of masochists, I wonder? But here pain is not so much enjoyed as it is a symbol of dedication, of working hard towards training the body and accomplishing physical goals. The dancers wear their bruises like girl-guide badges; if they could clip them to a ribbon, I’m sure they would.
Among the women at the studio, there is unquestioned respect for the physical achievements of themselves and each other; but outside the studio, it is a different story. Almost everyone I talk to has someone in their lives that disapproves, and are forced to spend a lot of time explaining and justifying their hobby to strangers. Resistant or unsupportive family and friends find it difficult to be persuaded without seeing the show for themselves, and unanimously switch camps once they do. The symbol of the pole and its associations with stripping are so strong that it takes concrete visual evidence to persuade people that a pole can be danced on without all the performer’s clothes ripping themselves from their body.
            Most of the girls I talk to at the dress rehearsal set themselves in fierce opposition to strippers; the suggestion that they may be in stripper territory visibly upsets and angers them. But Bonnie Black, the founder of this very studio, has a very different although equally fierce take on this binary. When Bonnie auditioned for “New Zealand’s Got Talent,” a derivative of the American television program which acts primarily as a glorified High School talent show, earlier this year, she was furious at presenter Dei Henwood when he announced that “the stripper” had made it into the second round. “Thanks for calling me a stripper in front of my fucking parents” she says about Henwood to me over coffee. She continues, “If you want me to strip for you, then I’ll strip. But don’t call me a stripper when I’m doing pole fitness; that’s a totally different thing.”

See you next week for more on the legendary Bonnie Black and my final thoughts in stripping for work and leisure in a post-feminist era!